Being Human

How often do you have the opportunity to look at the world through someone else’s perspective? Broadening horizons can open a place of understanding. But far too often our minds are preoccupied with the daily grind. Leaving us unavailable to receive more than what is directly affecting the visible or tangible of the moment.

We are all just being human, filled with desires and ideals. Yet everyone’s perception is different. We all walk different paths, no one’s life is exactly as any others. None of us go through life together attached, well unless you’re a conjoined twin I suppose.

Talking with my eldest daughter she realized this when she was telling me a story about a friend. She mentioned, Oh you remember her… I looked at her and said ,” I do not know what you were talking about. What happens on your journey isn’t always intertwined with mine.” 

As a parent sometimes you don’t even recognize things happening, as we are not with them 24/7. Where through this, only privileged to see information that you gather or are given. Through that, distorting what actually happened, to a rendition of what happened. Everyone can choose to reflect themselves in any way. Where often we put a façade up. 

How many times have you been greeted and answered “I’m good, thanks” even when you really aren’t. Susannah knows this all too well, as she constantly had a happy supportive face on. Sometimes to the point where friends would be over and everything seems great. To the last goodbye, where then she’s in my arms crying from the weight of the facade. 

What is the purpose of this mask… Self-preservation possibly or even destruction. When one’s self esteem is so low and a feeling of worthlessness takes over. The facade might be the dream of what you want to be. Or what you believe people expect of you. This is why so often people are surprised when someone who’s seemingly put together breaks down and shows the true colours of their feelings. It’s important to recognize that things like depression and anxiety and other mental health topics can’t be cookie-cuttered. Just because someone smiling doesn’t mean they don’t suffer or have problems. 

It’s funny though, as with or without the facade people will see what they want to see anyway. I’ve had this experience personally. A friend told me once that school was easy for me. I was shocked by this statement. As I struggled my whole life with school and feeling adequate academically. So I didn’t know where this idea came from. But then reflecting, it’s all about perception. This friend saw me at school being a part of the student council and having multiple jobs on campus.  Being a part of fundraising and community events, never actually seeing me study or very rarely. I suppose creating this perception that the little time she saw me working equals the work coming easy to me. But in reality my academic results came from tireless nights of hours upon hours of dedication. 

For me the facade is not worth the effort… Life is hard enough just being you… All the extras in the show ultimately come out in the long-run, as the production is hard to maintain. 

This all flows into a discussion on how experiences will help shape and direct life.   That you’re as strong as the situations you face through your journey. Some willingly chosen, others thrusted upon us. 

There is such a uniqueness, that we all have different journeys. That different paths mean Joy or suffering is relative to the person. Meaning something that seems so trivial to some, is a catastrophe to others. This is because they’ve only experienced what they’ve experienced. Hence the reason why a 2-year-old could have a total meltdown like the world is coming to an end.  Where, in the  moment, that is the toughest thing they’ve had to endure in their entire life. Or that’s how they perceive the situation and respond. 

Some say people are lucky or blessed for their experiences or for what they have. Regardless of perspective every breath is a gift. But ultimately, no one really understands what that person created or endured to be the person that is in front of you. You don’t see because you haven’t been involved in their full journey. You have no idea, as you were not there. This creates blurred lines or broken telephone that could turn into assumptions. We all know what assumptions can do… making an umption out of you….

It can take people’s imaginations through stages of all kinds of emotions. But assumptions towards someone else really is a waste of time. Where we shouldn’t be looking to others to compare and assume. It comes down to yourself. Compare your past self to your presence self, if you must compare. Has growth taken place, are you the person you strived to become. Not what other people expect you to be and not what other people are. 

You are you, uniquely yourself. You can strive to be similar to role models, but don’t lose sight that you’re not meant to be them. You are meant to be you. To leave your unique print on this world. That you have something special to offer. 

So, what keeps you up at night? Is it that you haven’t reached a preconceived idea, at a certain time in life because XYZ didn’t go the way you had planned. Really the only thing you can do is decide how you will react to how the world falls at your feet through your journey. Where those reactions lead us down paths, some dark and some light.

Journey, adapt to what life provides. A good friend of mine said to me the other day “We are all really just one step closer to death, dying a little more each day”.. My jaw hit the floor. I burst out with NO… You live everyday. 

But there we go on perspective again. There is beauty in all situations. Whether it’s a moment in time that you will keep with you forever, or a particular lesson learned. Keep your heart and vision open to allow whatever it is, the space to help you grow. 

Learn and lead with respect to everyone. I am humbled by the strength of many journeys. I am inspired by them. I am filled with gratitude for what my journey has offered. 

Feel the energy affected by experiences through the path. Reflect and choose to find as much light as possible. Learn through other people’s experiences. Doing so allows enlightenment on what this world has to offer.

With that, it actually can make the world seem like such an overwhelming place. There is so much to learn and know. Far more than one lifetime could absorb. With that in mind;

Focusing in on something you enjoy is important and really can act as a form of therapy and livelihood. This possibly provides some reprieve from the negative. But also allowing the negative to be processed and analyzed to allow for growth.

Learning from our history helps reduce repeating mistakes… We do it in industry all the time, through research & development, to improve safety and more.

How do we know the history is true? Or think of it this way, reporting on something is one perspective of a scenario. Where multiple perspectives repeating the same story would validate, somewhat. This is how procedures are developed in industry. Multiple trials working towards consistency through set parameters. Yet, as the story is told there’s always the potential for discrepancies, if it is second-hand description. Documenting in time, can counter this issue. But if that does not occur, all stories that have been experienced and then retold are second-hand. In turn, effects from human nature and the Pareto rule can come into play. “Named after Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto, it states that in many cases 20% of causes lead to 80% of effects.” [1]

Find a livelihood and thrive. Finding ways to appreciate this life will induce freedom, if only in your mind… Possibly giving you time to reflect on what’s important. 

Too often are we blinded by someone else’s agenda. 

I myself for years had my nose to the grindstone not even taking a second to look up at the horizon. Check out https://jemsmind.com/lake-horizon-sky-clarity/ for a reminder on how to reconnect perspective. 

Find something you Love and Embrace it. Use it as an outlet for much deserved “me time” that we don’t give ourselves. Far too often do we get consumed by the routine of our daily expectations. 

From here trying to find a way to take passion and build a career from it. It is never too late to walk away from something that doesn’t serve you…. 

Exposure is the key… 

Try a workshop or volunteer…

Chat with someone you know about their career.

Contact local post-secondary facilities to find out what they have to offer. Sometimes just looking at the possibilities can spark an interest. 

But above it all, don’t hold yourself back from the possibilities. All your previous experiences brought you to today. Regret and self-doubt on what has already passed is counterproductive. Look forward, you are worthy…. Value yourself.

Value is assigned when a belief of rarity or usefulness is perceived. Believe in your uniqueness, it holds as much value as you give yourself. Know your worth. You are worthy, encourage yourself to believe. Act, struggle, fall, rise until you achieve. 

Try Things

For you never know what might be your key.
Learning and discovering,
the Interest, the intrigue.
Which aspect could be your reprieve, 
as long as you perceive.
Lay a weld bead,
swing a hammer.
Construction creation,
build our nations. 
Imagined,
Design
Materials to be combined.
Drawings.
Paint.
Movement.
To inundate,
and undertake.
The community that it takes.
To Engineer.
To Produce.
A foundation,
through reputation.
That needs some configuration, 
of motivation. 
To see the inspiration.
Trades hold salvation, 
through renovation.
So voice your innovation,
Without hesitation.
To be a part of the generation,
Shining appreciation.
To all affiliation,
There shall be no discrimination…

If you never travelled a road
How do you know you’re not supposed to go? 

JEMI
Edit – WDI

[1] SafeStart, “What the 80/20 Rule Has to Do With Safety,” SafeStart, 18-Feb-2017. [Online]. Available: https://safestart.com/news/what-8020-rule-has-do-safety/#:~:text=The%2080%2F20%20rule%E2%80%94also,lead%20to%2080%25%20of%20effect. [Accessed: 17-May-2021].